"The Cure for Unrequited Love"
The School of Life
This is an Amazing Video by the School of Life regarding the tormenting issue of One-Sided Love. When you are completely infatuated or in love with someone who just doesn't feel that way in return, or who doesn't show you that same love you show him or her.
It's so easy to get stuck in a mental prison and to have your happiness and mental peace chained to the hope that maybe one day that person will love you back or love you better. Many psychologists and counselors or even your friends and family will argue that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, or cease all contact and force that person out of your memory.
But the School of Life offers different advice: Get to know that person better.
Find out more about who this person really is. Talk to this person more. Experience their presence more often. Over time your romantic notions of this person and their seeming flawlessness will begin to weaken as you little by little notice how shockingly human this person is. You'll notice their bad breath, their weird habits, their stupid opinions, their annoying attitude, their inconsistency, or how fake they can really be....
No matter how attractive or beautiful someone is or may seem, you are only seeing one side to that person. The more time you spend with people, even the people you love, the more annoying and irritating the person becomes. The more time you spend with someone, the more you need a break from them. You will come to realize in getting to know your crush better, that they are just another broken, annoying, irritating, and flawed person....just like you.
And even if you DO manage to score a date or start a relationship with someone you are CRAZY about.....the enjoyment is temporary. No matter how sexy or beautiful someone is to you, over time, you will grow bored of fucking the same person over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. You will get tired of their annoying rants, their weird demands, their hypocritical standards, and their unpredictable attitude. You will realize the endless prices you will pay to keep having sex with someone you've already had sex with a hundred times, and to maintain intimacy with someone who pisses you the fuck off all the time.
They are just human. And you are not that much better....nor that much worse.
The human species is a mess. We have a 95% genetic similarity to the Chimpanzee. How impressive huh? The Earth's dominant species is a slowly evolving ape.
It's okay to be in Love. It's okay to have your crush. It's okay to enjoy the thrill of flirtation and the pleasure of new sex. But do not base your happiness or self-worth on anything another person says or does. You will be constantly disappointed. Another person can NEVER make you happy.
You can only share and combine happiness when you are already happy and spend time with people who are also happy, or at least working on their happiness. Happiness is a PROCESS and a Journey of Self-Discovery, Self-Development, Self-Awareness, and Self-Actualization. Happiness is an Internal Experience and can only be experienced by each individual in their own reception of any experience, shared or not.
If you find yourself obsessed with someone, ask yourself why? If he or she wasn't hot or attractive, would you even care? If this person wasn't intelligent or funny, would they appeal to you? If they didn't flirt with you first, would you ever have bothered with them? There are ALWAYS conditions that lead to your infatuation. Without those conditions, you wouldn't care and you wouldn't be thinking about any of this.
Love someone for who they are whether or not they love you back. Love someone in their path as they are with the choices they are making for themselves. It's okay to feel appreciation and admiration for anyone, even if they don't ever return the sentiment. But it's not okay to put someone else responsible for your happiness. It's not okay to torture yourself over the mental conditions of another person.
Love because YOU love, but don't love because you're waiting for something to happen. Express how you feel, and if it is turned away, let it go. You can still keep your feelings, they are yours. Just understand that if you never had an actual relationship with them, then you didn't experience them fully, and you don't really know what you are or aren't missing. Your Dream Crush could have turned out to be your Worst Nightmare for all you know...
Don't forget to check out The School of Life on Youtube:
The School of Life is truly a wonderful and inspiring channel! You can find almost any topic imaginable. Please expand your options for perspective and challenge your current notions by checking out their channel and choosing any topic of your choice!
Love and Peace,
Alain Alexander Mesa
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